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Marienbad. Bohemia
May 28th 1870
Hon. James H. Orne
My Dear Sir:
The letter and paper of May 3d, which you so kindly sent me, was received here a day or two since. Since that time alas, to judge from the report of the Senate Committee && there is to my mind, so troubled with anxiety & sorrow---but little chance of the noble work of the House being responded to---by the Senate. Mr Edmunds the Sen---(in the place of that good, noble & true gentleman, dear Senator Foote) appears vehemently determined---that cruel injustice
shall be rendered to the bereaved family of the man, who was above all others in the great work of the War. If I could possibly live, otherwise than to be a mortification to myself, I would not make the least request---at the hands of those---who could so ameliorate my sad condition. I am almost helpless---there are days when I cannot walk straight. I am unable to wait upon myself---from very frequent illnesses---as in the only plainest & most obscure way, I can keep myself---assuredly with my small means I cannot keep a servant. I wrote you, dear Mr Orne, a hurried but sincere statement of facts, a week since from Eger, en route here. Then I told you, what my oldest
son & myself, have always kept to ourselves---that so soon---as my senses could be regained---I had every [Wash?] & every other indebtedness---sent to me & out of every dollar---I could command---I paid to the uttermost farthing. In some cases, known by the the administrators---but in a very few---it was all done by ourselves my son & myself out of my money so that it should be said---that President Lincoln---was not in debt. This is one of the causes, why I am so straightened now---for living as we were compelled to, my husband not being a rich man & we had to pay enormous prices for every thing---those war times. When I now hear, from cruel---wicked reckless assertions---how rich I am---often wanting
for a meal---that I would daily offer a hungry way farer---If I could. my broken heart, cries aloud & I sigh more than ever to be at rest by my darling husband's side. Under any circumstances, I believe I should have hastened to settle any indebtedness against the estate, but being often told---that the remaining salary of the four years, would be given to the family. All I wished then was to die, if it had been Our Heavenly Fathers will---and the great sorrow & oftentimes cruelty---I have endured since, does not soften the aspect of life---or deprive it of its bitterness. Please write me on receipt of this a candid statement & your just views of the situation of affairs.
5 I wrote you on my letter from Eger that on receipt of the refusal of the Sen. Com to confirm the bill---it was deemed best by my physician & two or three friends, that I should come on here. My mind is in such a disturbed state and truth to say---I am so unpleasantly situated---so unable to place myself in quarters---that one hearing my name, should occupy---that I am uncomfortable here. My health is very poor---so much so, since I have been here, now one week---I have had to send for the old physician of the place, two or three times---no menial near to assist me, if I was dying. Will not this condition of affairs, be rectified by a people---who are the nobles of the earth. Could my
devoted & indulgent husband, ever have anticipated---such a return for the work of freedom & saving his country---from a rebellious foe! Whilst I am writing, I am in receipt of a letter from my young son saying that Mrs Orne & her family have arrived at Frankfort & he has seen them! I feel like flying back---but will certainly very much shorten my stay here---to return to see them. There never was such goodness & nobleness of heart, I believe in any other woman in the world, as Mrs Orne possesses. Her loving sympathy---has been a great comfort to me. I will write her at once. If she had written me, she would have been coming earlier than July to Germany---I would have waited for her. As it is---two weeks hence---I return to Frankfort.
[written vertically across page 1] Hoping you will excuse this letter which in your great goodness---under the present trying circumstances I am sure you will---and earnestly requesting---your views of affairs & prospects in A---I remain most respectfully
Your Friend Mary Lincoln